Question:
Is it permissible for a girl to deal with her colleagues men at university? If so, How?
The answer:
It is permissible for a girl to cooperate with her colleagues men as long as it is necessary, like taking notes or asking him a question provided that it is done in a polite manner as Allah says:
"Be not too complacent of speech, lest one in whose heart is a disease should be moved with desire: but speak you a speech (that is) just."
Speech must be with just. How? There must be three conditions:
Firstly: Seriousness in speech and words, the modern style of speech or etiquette at work or university that a girl must smile first if she wants to speak with her colleague young man. It is not permissible because smiling only allowed with her unmarriageable people. If you smile to a man, he thinks that you love him, this is the nature of youth, so God says: "Speak you a speech (that is) just". Speech that is not soft or flirty. Speech must be normal and may be a little rough and serious in the type of speech and its duration. It means it can be just few words about a lecture or such things, but there is no need to expand the speech, just a question and an answer.
Secondly: Modesty must be among us, this is the order of Islam to us. We should not look in each other's eyes as we are talking. You may think this is strange in our society but this is Islam because Allah and his Messenger order a woman not to look in a man's eyes as they are talking and he does the same because this is essential in relationship between them. I say it again and again when a man and a woman are talking they should not look in each other's eyes as sight is the mail of the heart, he or she can look up or down or right or left to avoid looking in each other's eyes, because sight vanish the barriers and it stirs the inner desire inside man or woman. The second barrier is shaking hands, salam or greetings should be only by tongue not by hands and if once they have to do it, it should be by fingers' ends.
Thirdly: These dealings should be in public, not in the cafeteria or he invites her for tea or she gives him a chocolate and so on, as this gets them in doubt. They should not stay later together at university or get there earlier than others or get out of university everyday together. They should not get on transport together and he acts as her body guard, they should not be together in private or closed place and if they talk they should be serious and away from smiles, laughs and looks even if in study.
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